Being Forgotten

I have a long list of topics I plan on writing about but I'm really busy at the moment with rehearsals but this was something I just wanted to post.

It always seems to me, that after a relationship of mine ends, the guys just forget about me.  Like I was never there to begin with, and I really want to know how they forget about me so easily.  So apparently when I contemplate this, I write a poem like thing.

It’s hard not to ask you
How you forgot me.
I wonder everyday
How easy was it for you
To forget the smell of my hair
And the taste of my lips
And the sound of my breath
When it was quiet
 I want to ask so that
I can forget too
The way your hair felt
When I ran my hands through it
Or the way your arms tensed
When my fingers grazed them
I want to forget the way
you grinned when you were tired
I want to forget you

So yeah.  Its stupid.

Accomplishment

Often I say I'm going to do something, and then never do.

Either I'm gonna start working out, or I'm going to clean my room, or start dressing better, stop spending money, craft something, paint something move something.

The list of things I say I'm going to do is endless.

There are so many projects, stories, things that I have started and yet never finished.  I have stories I've written years ago that I just stop writing after a few chapters and then never go back to.

Its a problem and I always hate myself because of it.

But that ends today.  For the first time ever (and I mean ever) I have finished a project that I set out to do.  Its nothing big, in fact its quiet silly when I think about how excited I am about it.

Months ago, I don't actually remember when but months ago, I found an old bed side dresser on craigslist.  It was free so I decided, why not I'll go and get it and fix it up, paint it make it look nice.  I mean I've been using an old stereo as a bedside table for the last like 5 years.

My step dad sanded it and got it ready for me to paint, we got the paint but due to how cold its been I haven't been able to do anything with it.  Finally though it was warm enough for me to paint it.

After about 2 weeks of painting whenever it was warm enough  I have finally finished it.

It is now settled in my room next to my bed.

I love it.  I couldn't be more proud of it.  Or of myself.

I finally finished something.

Finally.

Here are some pictures!  I don't have any of it before because I didn't think about it.

This is what I had been using

This is it what I'm now using.  The color is off because of lighting but its a nice, robins egg blue(ish) color

I painted the inside of the drawers a different color because I liked the idea.  Its sort of a sea foam/mint green.

And this is the finished product, in its proper place.

I even kept the original handles and I'm really happy I did because they look really good.

Its stupid I know.  But I'm really proud of it.  Because I have a real problem with follow through.